I realize I’ve been uncharacteristically silent the last several days. There has just been so much on my to-do list that those other things have overshadowed the daily or semi-daily blogging groove. Also, there really hasn’t been much noteworthy news to share lately.
I’m struggling to find balance in my life. Staying at home is a double edged sword in that way. It can easily drive a person mad if one is not careful. I love being at home with my boy, I love taking care of him, how he smiles when he sees me and when we play. We’ve started doing a little mom & baby yoga/pilates workout every other day or so, which would be entirely fun if we could manage to get through the whole thing from start to finish, but is still pretty fun even with the interruptions. I love taking his picture, which gives me practice with my camera, and I especially love when he sleeps so I can load or unload the dishwasher or laundry without feeling like a horrible ogre if he’s crying for those five minutes.
Right now around the house there are a few things going on. Not anything spectacular, just things like trying to get the boy to nap in his crib instead of on my lap, learning how to determine when he’s actually hungry instead of just wanting to suck, establishing a bedtime, organizing the office so that I can do some work at a desk where it actually feels like work instead of something I’m just trying to cram into my day, and keeping up with the chores. We have a big spring cleaning planned, which should yield us a little more storage space than the “none” we have left right now. It’s a good thing we’re too broke to buy anything new, we wouldn’t have anywhere to put it anyway.
Speaking of which, financially, we could be doing a hell of a lot better, but I’m fairly optimistic (when I’m not hyperventilating) that things are going to pick up for us again soon. The last few months have been difficult, which may just be the understatement of the year, and we’re in a pretty big hole debt-wise. However, things could be worse. We’re lucky to have what we have, and the rest will take some work. There is hope, there is determination, there are strategies in place.
We have a new car that I’m looking forward to driving. It’s going to replace our beloved little lawnmower (the Tercel) once we get it registered and the carseat installed. It has four doors, and I am probably more excited about those two extra doors than anyone has ever been about doors.
I took M to a play group last week. He sat on my lap and watched the other kids walk and run around. But I didn’t really go there for him. I went there to meet other moms from my neighborhood. I went there for me. I’ve been going to the local La Leche League meetings, but those are only once a month, so it’s kind of hard to get to know the other moms well even though it has been an extremely valuable resource for any breastfeeding issue that comes up. The playgroup is part of a local moms club and occurs once a week. And the club does a lot of different things in addition to monthly meetings and weekly playgroups. There are toy swaps, babysitting co-ops, moms’ nights out, community service projects, and other stuff like that. The moms I met at the playgroup were very nice and welcoming, so I have high hopes for my continued involvement.
I had lunch with a friend yesterday. The friend lunch is another important item to work into my weekly schedules, I think. Because the majority of my daily conversation involves entertaining an infant, it’s good for my mind to connect with the few friends I do have in the area. It’s also good for my body and spirit to get out of the house for awhile. I tend to be pretty bad at initiating get togethers, so I’m working on that, too, and so far, what I have initiated has been very rewarding.
I meant to have more of a cohesive length of text for this post today, but as you can see, I have several trains of thought on my tracks. It’s been tough finding enough time to actually focus on any one of them in real life, so the writing about it all is bound to be a bit scattered, too.